No, Not Yet

My granddaughter is 2 years old. When I said, “You are getting so big.” She said, ‘No, not yet.” When I said, “You need to use the potty chair.” She said, “No, not yet.” When I said, “It is time for bed.” She said…that’s right, “No, not yet.”

I believe my granddaughter is really quite brilliant. She has found a way to say no that is completely endearing. A simple ‘no’ is easy to reckon with but a ‘no, not yet’ said in a calm, practical voice is hard to resist. How did she get so smart?

Smarter than her grandma, that is for sure. Juggling two demanding jobs {the day job and the night job} has gobbled up my free time. Family has first dibs on the free time I salvage. Everything else is taking a back seat as in “No, not yet.”

Learning a New Language at My Age? You Betcha!

I have started to dream in Spanish. This has never happened to me before. As a monolingual speaker {English} my thoughts, words and dreams have been predictably understandable. Now? I am waking up in the middle of the night as I try to translate the words flowing through my mind.

This is not my first brush learning a new language. I had three years of high school German. It was interesting. It was scary (especially before each test). And yet I never learned the language and I certainly didn’t dream it.

What has changed? Duolingo.

What is Duolingo you ask? “Duolingo is a free service that helps you learn languages with your friends while simultaneously contributing to translate real-world content from the Web.”

It is addicting. It is free, fun, and better than playing solitaire.

So, when I am not spending time at my two jobs, I am learning a new language. Which is coming in handy. Yesterday at work, a toddler said words that previously were not understandable to me. But now, I know she was asking for a drink. Amazing. Inspiring. Empowering. Maravilloso!

How to Spank a Keurig without Anyone or Anything Being Hurt

I panicked yesterday. I turned on my Keurig, waited for it to heat, inserted my K-cup and then pressed the brew button. Nothing happened but a small sound resembling a ‘clunk’.

This cannot be happening! My first attempt to solve my “You may not be having any coffee today” problem was to repeat the process all over again. Guess what, same result. So I did what any caffeine and sleep deprived person would do. I initiated the same steps again and again and again. My Keurig continued to give one ‘clunk’ for each of my efforts. Realizing I was getting nowhere, I unplugged the machine, placed it on a shelf in my pantry {giving Keurig a time out} and drove to Starbucks.

Last night I did not have any contact with my Keurig. I did not look at it. I did not talk to it. I did not touch it. My Keurig had let me down and I was nursing some very injured feelings.

This morning, I googled “how to fix a Keurig when it will not brew”. To my surprise, one of the fixes involved spanking {aka the burp and slap method}. Yep, that is correct. If your Keurig is being naughty, just give its bottom a good spanking.

After reading K-Cup Barista‘s tips for fixing my coffee maker, I decided to bypass all of the simple troubleshooting ideas and went straight for the spanking. Here are the steps:

1. Unplug the Keurig.
2. Remove the water reservoir and the drip tray.
3. Turn the Keurig upside down and give it a good 10 slaps on the bottom.

I followed the steps and after I was done, I plugged in my Keurig, replaced the water reservoir and tried it out. It did not brew but now I heard a ‘clunk’, a ‘chunk’ and a ‘gurgle’. Progress! I unplugged the machine and repeated the spanking all over again.

The result of that second spanking? Well, I am happy to report that my Keurig and I have come to an understanding about who is the boss around here. And…the coffee I am sipping is, oh so, delicious.

Check out the full post ‘What to Do if Your Keurig Won’t Brew‘ at K-Cup Barista

Jowls, Howls and dare I say…

Let’s get right to the detractors…

Skin no longer behaves as it used to. It doesn’t spring back. It doesn’t smooth out. It wrinkles and sags and, well, shows its age. Let’s not mention the fear when you peer into a mirror and suspect you are seeing what looks like the beginning of jowls. That cannot possibly be my image reflected in the mirror.

Next we have the growing ability to express ourselves with howls of laughter or howls of pain. Either way, the howls are going to erupt from you at the most inopportune times. And how about the newfound ability to snort. Now where did that gift come from? Please, go away.

Finally, there is the digestive system. Really, enough said. Almost. Young people need to be aware that this once normally functioning bodily system will eventually revolt and cause embarrassment and anguish. I could go into graphic detail but I won’t…today.

And yet, I would not turn back the clock one moment. I am thankful for the gifts age has given me. Perspective. Patience. Acceptance.  Blah, blah, blah.

Okay. What is really bothering me? The possibility of jowls. Jowls!

I Got Nothin’

It is interesting getting older. I am more sure of who I am. I feel comfortable in my skin. I am a survivor.

As my body ages, I find solace spinning the deficits due to aging into strengths. For example, I have become a really awesome listener. People talk and I really, really listen.

Why is this different from my previous behavior? When I was younger, as people talked I was formulating my own responses while listening with half an ear. As I’ve grown in age and, I hope, wisdom, I realize my words are not as important as my presence to the person with whom I am engaged. Also, I must admit, I am less able to retain {in my mind} multiple talking points as I wait for my speaking turn. So, I might as well listen…well.

This is happening more frequently.

I was recently in a meeting with some up and coming professionals who were brainstorming ideas. I was completely engaged as I listened to the back and forth exchanges around the table. Finally, the group noticed my silence and all eyes turned to me. Looking for sage advice, the youngsters asked, “What do you think?”

I had been waiting for this opportunity to guide these young ones. Unfortunately, I had done such a good job listening that I had not formulated my own response. As seconds turned into a minute, with all eyes on me, I knew I had to say something. I smiled, folded my hands on the table and said, “I got nothin’“.

We erupted in laughter as soon as the words were out of my mouth because this is not my usual behavior. I regrouped and was able to regain my verbal stride. To no one’s surprise!

This experience reminded me of my grandmother who was a great listener. When she visited, we took turns unburdening ourselves to her because she would sit and listen for as long as it took. She didn’t have a lot to say, she just listened and nodded and smiled. When all was said and done, she affirmed her belief in us, our ability to cope with whatever came our way and her love for us.

If aging means that I will become a really great listener to the important people in my life then I say…bring it on.

Be Thankful and Be Not Afraid

In all my years of life I have never, ever purchased a bumper sticker. That is until one month ago. That day, I was driving around town when I saw a car sporting a message that resonated so deeply with me that I knew my previously pristine bumper would not remain so for long. I googled the message and found the bumper sticker on the web (of course).

I was so excited to find it that I purchased 15 of them. Ha! Now if, over the years, my bumper sticker ever wears out, I have ample replacements waiting in the wings. I also figure many of my holiday stockings will become filled with this message.

As I look forward to a Thanksgiving Day spent with family, I want to remember the lessons of love and courage passed down from generation to generation. And this mama is so very thankful, embracing love and life and rejecting fear.

If you haven’t heard Mike Mangione sing Mama, Be Not Afraid, here is your chance. Take it away Mike…

~ Mama, Be Not Afraid by Mike Mangione & The Union

“The dirt road I come from
A storm from the past
Dust twirls in cyclone curls
And lays me on the grass
Steady as a heartbeat
And as fleeting as a wave
I break crest on newborn shores
From everlasting graves
I walk the seams
Of night and day
Amidst tears of all unknown
Please and face night fall cause
In the darkness light is shown

Ohh no
Ohh yeah
Mama, be not afraid”

My $75 Loaf of Bread

I am trying to adjust to my new normal. As a public employee in Wisconsin, transitioning from a teacher contract to an employee handbook, life has become very uncertain. People expect change to happen at work each year. But this school year, the wide variety of changes feel like a roller coaster ride with mainly a series of plunges and I am not a thrill seeker.

So, to give myself a feeling of control, and financial as well as mental stability in this time of cuts and uncertainty, I put myself on a strict monthly budget and took a second job at night.

Looking for a positive spin to this new need for frugality, I decided to resurrect the motto of my grandparents ”Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without.”

Dad grew up on a Depression era farm in North Dakota. He didn’t know he was poor until he was an adult and was informed so by people who had money. While his family was not rich in dollars, they were rich in food, family support and laughter. One of my fondest memories of my ‘granny’ is spending time in her kitchen as she created the most incredible baked goods.

I have longed to recreate the homemade bread that I can still taste if I close my eyes. I remember watching Granny hold a huge loaf of bread against her chest as she walked around the dinner table slicing portions for all of us to savor fresh from the oven. And I have thought, I can make my own bread. It will be delightful and… save money.

Finding a bread recipe that is equal to my memories has been a challenge. And, the flops I have created in my kitchen over the last few months have been disappointing.

Recently, I found a recipe for no-knead bread that was intriguing. Unfortunately, the recipe (adapted from Jim Lahey) called for a heavy covered pot (cast iron, enamel, Pyrex or ceramic). I went to my cupboards and like Old Mother Hubbard my cupboards were bare and did not hold a covered pot that could withstand 450 degrees in the oven. So, I went shopping. With my coupons, I purchased a cast iron pot for $71.43. Seriously. That was more than I planned (certainly not in my budget) but I really wanted to make this bread!

Following a recipe I found on The New York Times website for No-Knead Bread, I set to work. I mixed up my ingredients and then waited for 18 hours. As my dough did its thing, I was reminded of all of the dough Granny had in various stages of proofing in covered bowls in her pantry all those years ago.  I always thought it was weird (and slightly unsanitary) that she let dough sit out for what seemed like days.

As one day turned into the next, my dough was finally ready. I flipped it into my heated pot and baked my bread with fingers crossed. The smell of baking bread infiltrated every corner of our home. I could hardly wait to taste my first slice and when I did, I closed my eyes and savored.

I finally realize the secret of bread, which I wish I had learned from my experiences long ago…Great bread takes time.  And, as it turns out, a little bit of money.

I plan to stir up my fifth batch of bread dough this morning. Each time I bake a loaf, I divide my number of baked loaves by my original $75 investment (the cast iron pan + ingredients). Today’s loaf will bring my cost down to $15 a loaf. Makes me smile.

No-Knead Bread – Finished Loaf (Photo credit: Wikipedia)